-HELLO-
I blog what i want and when i feel like it.Ive no time for people judging me
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Together since 170510
I love him and forever will
WHAT'S MINE IS MINE
Dislikes... Bitches Dark
chocolates Cockroaches Pampered
child Wishlist... Car & Motor license Big
house Cats
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...-Friends-...
AFIQAHmaniac(Private)
AFIQAHmaniac
Yanaa Sioww(Private)
MawarCiner
S-L-E-H
Tasya
Never did i ask for much things . All i need is someone who i can trust ,talk about everything and anything ,the one who can go crazy with me and understand me at all my good and bad times . But nothing seems to be like it right now.
Is it me ? Did i take advantage of what i had before ? Sometimes im just too lazy to think about all of these things . But something just had to make me feel guilty about it .
What goes around comes around and now im too tired to even save whats infront of me . Things just falls apart . Right ?
Diana Andriana
It's S A T U R D A Y ! Kinda bored here so ..i'll just blog a bit . Umm ..what was myy topic again ? Okayy umm ..i'm blogging cause i think people nowadays don't have time to blog ,and they don't even give a damn about blogs . Twitter is into the trend now after all the other social networks . Heh ! Why i prefer blogging ? Cause people don't bother to look up to your blog and read about you . They prefer the instant news where they go through it everyday . Don't talk about Twitter ..i'm like so dumping it far away from me . Reason ? I don't wanna see something that makes my heart goes racing like a horse running on the track ..and baaaam !! Broken glasses being pierced through your heart . But life has it ups and downs . So just live with it . Full of haters and fake friends . Only some bother to stay and stick around after knowing your attitude . Life changes too . You can't always be on top ..there is times where you'll also be at the bottom .
I'm sick of playing mind games . I'm sick of taking in things too lightly . I'm sick of always being in a 'it's okay' situation . No i'm not . I'm still hurting . I still can't forget what happened infront of my eyes . One mistake with his words and i'm there staring blankly into space . The first thing that came into my mind was ,'why did he change ?' And the answer to it was ,'it started from my stupidity' . Well i can't always blame myself . But it's the fact doesn't it ? If it's not because of me ..things won't turn out this way . Nothing could change back the times . What is left is just memories . Life has to move on . I kept blaming myself . Sometimes i just wanna scream and let out my feelings that i've been keeping . It's hard to hide these and pretend nothing happens . But to speak up to a person about it ..especially if it involves feelings . It's not as easy as it seems . You can keep practicing the lines infront of the mirror for hours and still have the hesitating moment to speak up . It's just hard . Cause when you speak ..the feelings involves is not only you but the other party too . The moment you express yourself ,the other one might be hurt to what's spoken . You have to take care of two feelings at once .
18th October today . I'm here in bed ,still feeling dizzy and stuffs . Done too much thinking lately ..
Daniel , I promise to love you ,even if the times get rough ,to stay by your side at all times ,carry you up if you fall ,and to stay no matter how hard it gets ... I love you ,because you have a cute personality ,a smile so sweet ,and eyes which are so adorable . Happy 28th monthsary ! Hope we'll be strong enough to go through everything :)) Dyan(A)ndryana
Homed from meeting Baby :) . It was fun eventhough we didn't do much . I know he was trying to make the day . Appreciate his effort ;) . To be honest ,i really do miss what we had last time . We talked like there's never end to each chapter . But that didn't mean i hate the new us . We're still quite the same eventhough there's changes . I miss being treated like a princess ,i miss being called sweetheart ,i miss us being on the phone ,i miss how he used to send me home ,i miss how we talk crap in each conversation ,i miss spending time with him ,going out ,walking around and enjoy the atmosphere ,i miss how we held each other's hand ,i miss how he kissed me ,i miss our good morning and goodnight texts ,i miss how he used to wipe my tears ,how he used to hugged me . I just miss everything . EVERYTHING . But i can't blame him ,time changes situations . You just have to accept it whether you like it or not . Time can't be rewind neither stop . It goes forward . There's no use if i tell him this ,cause he's not god to change everything . He's just a normal person . Maybe he feels the same way too ,but we'll never know . Sometimes i get jealous when he talked to other girls so happily . I don't know what issit called in english but in malay we call it 'mesra' . Maybe i'm feeling what he is feeling when i did that to him . Well ,what goes around comes around . Have to accept the fact though . I can't stop him from doing all those cause that's part of his personality . He is friendly . Well-liked by people . Can't do anything about it . Everywhere i go ,i see sweet couples . Yes i do envy them . In smile ,i cry inside . When can i have that sweet smile and happy thoughts when we're together ? I can't really forget what happened in between us ,but when i'm with him ,i just have to smile and push away those thoughts . I had enough crying infront of him . I can't control my emotions at that time . But now everything is fine ,eventhough each of us knew nothing could erase any dreadful incident . You just have to bear with the pain . Relationships have their ups and downs . It's okayy ..i still have him here and i'm already happy with what i have :) Another 8 more days to our monthsary ^^ Dian(A)ndriana
It's Saturday, 6th October . Just came back from Qama's open house and now i'm here expressing my thoughts . What i planned went well today . I really wanted to talk to him, but since i became speechless . I start to type it out . It was pain . Even i didn't speak out a single word, the tears just flowed. But every single detail that i knew never missed out. It was a relief after telling . It's like all my burden jst flew away. I was happy for awhile. If it wasnt myy friends ,i dont know what i'm doing now. Somehow today is just like another boring Saturday . Nevermind . Guess its not working .
Society sucks . They say all the bad things about you without knowing your story in the first place . And they keep on saying the same thing to each other but nothing helps ..really . My english might not be good but at least i tried to speak and type normally . I may not be pretty like all the other girls . But what for should i change for society ? If everyone goes on like that ,than the world would be filled with perfectos . Be original ...
Sometimes i do wonder why i'm not good enough for some people . But i don't give a damn now . They will say what they want to but they can't change me for who i am . They may not take me as a fun person to be with . But my personality is a shy and quiet person . I may be outgoing at times ..but it all depends on how comfortble i am with that person . You'll get too friendly ..that's it . That's where all the hopes and dreams start to pile up . I ain't giving that shit anymore . Sometimes i'm sick of trying too . But once you give up ..it's just failure . In life its just about keep trying and keep moving on . Time won't stop for you to go back and correct your mistakes . It's all about the future . Keep looking forward and ignore the past .
Broken hearts takes time to heal . All you need is patience and the confidence that you can do it . Stop looking to the past cause it ain't doing anything for the future except that you won't do the same thing twice . Some things are just to be kept within us . Cause they won't care about you ..
Dyan[A]ndryana
It hurts . It really does . But things change and you can't go back to rewind those times and amend your mistakes ...
Dyan[A]ndryana
Maybe it's my fault for all these changes . Maybe i didn't know how to take care of people's feelings . Maybe i'm just dumb for this thing . I'm always not good enough for anyone . But what did i lack in this relationship ? Attention ? Trust ? Care ? Well ,maybe i'm just a boring person to him . I don't know how to communicate with him .i don't know anything . What the fuck was i even thinking ? I've tried hard to make things work ,but nothing goes according to plan . Maybe i'm a bit too kind for this . But if i don't care ,i'll end up losing . I'm done crying . I'm done wasting my tears for this . No one cared . They're just there . Keeping feelings do hurt ,but it'll lead to grudges . I tried to speak ..but nothing comes out ..only tears that flowed . I tried to be happy ..but a simple smile can't even appear on my face . Why is it so hard ? I can't even explain what i'm feeling now . I don't know who to blame ...
But to be truthful ,i really miss those times when we were so happy together ..everyday seems so special to me . Now ? I don't know . I'm getting speechless day by day . I hate to fight ,i hate to waste my tears ..but why does it happen all the time ? I'm always afraid of losing him ..i'm always missing him ..but does he feels the same way too ? I'm afraid to ask . Scared to know the answer . But to keep quiet ,you'll never know . I'm just done here ..what else can i do ?
Dyan[A]ndryana
The one who captures my heart ,the one love i owned ,and the sweetest guy i've ever known .
Through all the ups and downs ,and all the fights that we had ,my love for you still stays cause nothing can change it . For these years we've been together ,i really appreciate how you took care of me ,treating me well . So what if some of the fights hurts me ? The onlyy thing that'll make me die inside is when we call it over . Believe me ,i love you more than ever . I appreciate how we tried to make things work ,how we spend the time together . The memories that we created were unforgetable . Even the smallest little details . I really cherish everything that you've done for me .
Yes ,i admit ,i'm not perfect to be a person ,i made mistakes . But one thing for sure ,i didn't make the wrong choice for loving you .
I love you because ,you are very patient ,loving and caring . A very gentle person who controls his emotions ,and a thoughtful lover .
Love you !
...=+-Coming Soon-+=...